Monday, September 27, 2010

31. "Well you smell!"...See anyone can do it

 I have often wanted to punch a person in their face. Usually this urge comes over me while I'm at work and it always seems to involve an annoying person who smells like poop. I have had many urges to punch somebody but I can say I have never been in a fight. Not a physical fight, even though I have had my fist clinched in some situations. I just have never come up with anything or situation that is worth hitting somebody. If your going to fight it better be for something good not because somebody spilled a drink on you.

31. "Well you smell!"...See I can do it tooooo
 I can't stand fighting. I just do not see how punching somebody or hitting them accomplishes ANYthing. Add in the possible assault charges that you could get and any adult should be able to control themselves from doing bodily harm to another human being. Nobody looks cute behind bars not even Lindsay Lohan, serious criminal records stick harder then some STD'S. Whenever a confrontation happens it usually involves some taunting possibly some liquor maybe some bad blood and of course people with no self-control. It's not hard to taunt somebody or insult them so don't think making somebody angry enough to hit you is an accomplishment. Since reality tv has taken over our lives you should be able to get your lifetime dose of stupid fights by watching an episode of Jersey Shore or Bad Girls Club. Be the bigger person or the smarter person, just be the person who is able to just walk away from a dumb situation. If you want to suck then be the idiot trying to provoke somebody so you can get out whatever anger issues you feel that will be helped by punching somebody. If your a bully and like to taunt people then you are a sucky person that will end up in jail so I advise practicing your pose for your mugshot early Paris Hilton might be able to help you out she has the pose down. Now if some crazy comes at you then its game on!

Sooo who would've thought moving somewhere randomly while having your salary cut in half would not end up exactly as you planned in your head....obviously not me! In the latest episode of my life we can all talk about how many bad decisions can I make before I'm 25. I am pretty sure I can get a few more good ones in within a year. Since I would've never moved if I knew how much I was getting paid so some of my decisions could be put in the file of misinformed choices. But misinformed or not I am well on my way to living in a cardboard box which sucks because cardboard boxes do not look very comfy and I kinda like showering everyday. Ahhhh I really do hope that one day I can actually dig myself out of the enormous hole I've dug and be able to relax even if it is only for a little bit. Sad thing is I found a degree that I'm excited about but unless I grow a money tree looks like thats not going to work out. Back to the drawing board.....To be continued.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

30. Listen, think about it then respond

I work in a world where people only hear things ten minutes after you tell them. It is so weird because sometimes it really feels as if were playing follow the leader. The leader is always far enough ahead that they are sitting there waiting for the person with their feet kicked up reading the tv guide and eating bon-bons. I exaggerated a little bit there I know nobody reads tv guide anymore, can you even still buy those? I had at least six different conversations today that involved me saying the same thing in about three different ways before the person understood and not because their dumb people but because I wasn't saying what they wanted to hear. I don't get it, do people really think asking me the same question multiple times is going to magically change the answer to what they want it too be?

30. Listen, think about it then respond
Please, please I am begging you do not reply or act unless you have heard and processed what somebody just used brain cells to tell you. If you ask somebody a question and don't get the answer you want back you should not ask the question in a different way expecting the answer to change. It will save soo much time if people listened more and acted less. More often then not people go on what they thought they heard and not what they actually heard which is pretty sucky. People who don't listen suck. I have done it many a times, I just keep moving on without really hearing what somebody is saying then later on down the road it comes back to punch me in my face. I hate getting punched in the face : (

Tomorrow is Sunday. The Colts play tomorrow. We shall see if last Sunday was a fluke where they were pretending to be a well oiled football machine or if are going to suck it up all season like they did against the Texans. Only time shall tell and time is telling me right now I need to be productive tomorrow like super duper productive. Til next time!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Time Flies when....

I am being lazy! I haven't posted in a week because I have been busy working, watching tv online, looking for a new job, and trying to do some school. But I have some news, I made a new blog!!! I know exciting stuff happens here. My new blog is Letters-Unsealed and I will be posting there everyday from now on. I will keep updating this blog too but just not as often as I have been. Thanks for reading and please continue!!!!

Monday, September 20, 2010

29. The Answer to your question is...Procrastination!

29. The Answer to your question is...Procrastination!
I really think this could be my middle name because I am pretty freaking awesome at it. I mean I'm not trying to brag or anything but I can probably beat anybody in a procrastination contest. I don't know what the events would be but I can predict that I'd be late to wherever the competition takes place and I will not be prepared for it. I just do not understand why I wait until the last minute then silently wish to myself that somehow that test scheduled for last Monday could be put off for hmmm a week or two. For some reason I think all due dates pertain to everyone else but me and i'm paying for it. I suck this semester which makes no sense because I graduate in May and all I have to do is make it two more semesters but I suck which means I will be in college for the rest of my life. So if you want to suck too just start procrastinating a little more trust me this is the quickest path to success I've tested it repeatedly.

It is no secret that I don't enjoy my job all that much. If this is news to you then I know you haven't read any of my other posts which would only be possible if you had no internet access in the last month. It's cool I understand my internet access is pretty touch and go sometimes due too us "borrowing" it from our apartments clubhouse. We all get a little behind on the times now and then, how else can you explain feathered bangs and mullets. I digress, I have many reasons for disliking my job but one of many would be listening to people repeatedly ask the same dumb questions. I honestly don't even understand why people call us, then proceed to ask questions that they already have the answers too or could find on their own if they stopped being lazy. People really think that if they somehow say it in a cute enough voice we won't get irritated. Please, I am begging you tomorrow if you go to pick up the phone to call the pharmacy with a dumb question or some ridiculous sob story or to get a phone number to some other pharmacy put the phone back down.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

28. Wait I'm confused do you like them or not?

Here is a synopsis on how the circle of your people works and no I'm not talking about on a cellphone I'm talking in life. Ok so there is you and you are the center of your circle because you can't really leave yourself. The first ring is the people you love, the ring after that is made up of the people you like, then the ring after that is the people you kinda like, and the people that don't even make a ring who are floating around outer space because you just don't  like them.

28. Wait I'm confused do you like them or not?
It is quite alright to not like people and choose to avoid them at all times. It is not ok to not like somebody but every time you see them in person you run and hug them then continually tell them how cool they are. Not only is this little practice, which I like to refer to as Foe-Friendship, confusing but it is also sucky. Lets write this little rule in cement: do not smile to somebodies face then as soon as they turn their back talk about how you can't stand them. Usually people only maintain a Foe-Friend relationship if they get some kind of benefit from it such as free drinks or rides or food. If somebody only calls you when they need a ride and not when they want to do something else like hangout then they are using you. They do not like you and you giving them rides all the time will not make them like you. If you are only called on certain occasions where your presence is beneficial to them then you are not in any of their circles circles so don't keep them in yours. Stop you foe-friendships because honestly they are sucky and in the end somebody always ends up with dirt in their eye. It is not fun having dirt in your eye, it hurts like really bad so avoid it!

I am going to go out on a limb and say tonight was a good night while hoping I don't suddenly get a bomb dropped on me for calling it early. Manning bowl ended with the Indianapolis Colts walking away with a  nice victory. The Colts actually looked like the team that almost went undefeated last year and thankfully they did not look like the terrible team that played last Sunday. Also I think I have turned my roommate into a football fan! She said, "Now that I watched it I think it's kinda cool". Now this makes me happy because hopefully I won't be the girl sitting at the bar alone watching games because go ahead and say it that girl always looks a little lonely. So I am going to say this Sunday was a pretty good Sunday which I hope that means that this week will be a good week.......only time will tell Nighty Night

Saturday, September 18, 2010

27. If it is really so great why are you trying to give it away?

Some people have no shame or conscious. Search the internet for tales of scams and you will get back a good amount of responses. You will hear of people who promise you the world and then steal your money before disappearing. In my life experience I have found that if it sounds too good to be true then not only is it not true but by associating with it you will walk away with less then you came with. 

27. If it is really so great why are you trying to give it away?

Anybody that can make money off of nothing more then hard work and intelligence I am impressed by you. A good business transaction is when both people on each side of the deal walk away feeling satisfied. As in any good relationship if one person is not satisfied transaction is finished then it was a failure. A good business man has repeat customers who not only use the product or service but also recommends it to friends. Now people that make money off lies and over exaggeration are not practicing good business they are stealing within the law. Scam artists piss me off and really are sucky people because all you are doing is taking advantage of others to benefit yourself. With my recent attempt of finding a new job because I got screwed by my current employer I have had a few run ins with some scams. I can't believe people actually have the nerve to put up fake jobs so that people will apply and then you can off some dumb service or online college for them to sign up for. All these commercials proclaiming "I found the way to make a ton of money and I want to tell you how to do it" or "I was poor and living on the streets now I am a multimillionaire and I want to tell you my secrets", are soo lame. If you had some secret no fail way to make money you would not going around charging people to find out what it is. If you really had some magical money plan you would keep it to yourself or tell your close friends then spend the rest of your time vacationing on your own private island. Sucky is as sucky does I guess.....(yeah I don't really know what that means but it makes sense at least it does with rum in my system!)

So I took a little trip to the liquor store the other day and made a bit of a discovery....
Thats right all you vodka drinkers can suck it! Because us rum drinkers can now join you in your love for the inexpensive flavored vodka brand Burnett's. Seriously the only flavor of vodka they don't have is mint and I am sure that one is on it's way. Anyway I am a Captain Morgan fan until the day comes I puke off of it so it pains me to say that with a recent decrease in my cash flow I have to go generic on my alcohol purchases. So I was pleasantly surprised when I saw this little bottle sitting on the shelf and I knew I had to try it. I can't say that this replaces the Captain because we all know nothing will replace the Captain but this fits my budget and helps me accomplish my the only goal I have when I drink which is to get drunk. So thank you Burnett's  from all the people who can't afford Captain Morgan we owe you big time :)

Friday, September 17, 2010

26. I can see you I'm not blind and if I was blind unfortunately I'd still see you

 Let me see how many ways can I say this. There are those people that are shall we say a bit needy. Not needy as in my car ran out of gas and is now blocking the road can I get money from you. But needy as in I need you to give me attention before I explode. I know you hear me, I need you to acknowledge you hear me then continue to repeat those two steps every two minutes.How else can it be described? Attention whore.Yep I think that sums it all up, the people that seriously need to be constantly reminded that their not invisible are the exact people you wished were invisible.

26. I can see you I'm not blind and if I was blind unfortunately I'd still see you
Could you imagine what the conversation would be if all the attention whores of the world were forced into one room. There would be no conversation because everyone in the room would be talking very loudly and nobody would be listening. A group of us went out with a girl recently that if she was talking and not enough people were listening to her she would wave her hand around yelling everyone needs to listen to the short girl until we all looked at her. Man that little short girl almost lost an arm that night. Attention is grimy if you have to demand it I think, the kind of attention you have to demand is usually negative anyway. Don't be an attention whore and chase after grimy dirty attention because then you suck. Like when two girls make out with each other on Spring Break that is for grimy attention or when guys on the beach strike a pose to flex their muscles its for grimy attention. Oh or when people are pathological liars telling stories about how they hung out with the pope that it is all for grimy attention. Or when people are in a public place having a conversation super loud trust me it is not to blend into the crowd. Lesson of the day don't be an attention whore because it is annoyingly desperate and sucky. That is all!

Tomorrow brings a day full of homework, library time, job hunting, and a forced but highly enjoyed workout. Hitting the path along the marsh tomorrow and doing the whole six miles! Ohh I am cleaning too I know you wanted to know that. I finally watched the Grey's Anatomy season finale and O-M-Goodness, I can not wait until next week when it is new again. But if they mess with Meredith and McDreamy I will get mad because it took five seasons for them to actually be happy. They are too cute together, I miss the days of watching shows with my sisters that we dvr'ed. I could go for an episode of Toddlers & Tiaras right now. Gimme the crown Witch! 

Thursday, September 16, 2010

25. Run out of your comfort zone

Conversation I had with a girl once:
Her: What are you doing this weekend?
Me: Nothing really, probably going to a frat party since it's homecoming. You can come if you want.
Her: I hate frat parties
Me: Have you ever been to a frat party?
Her: No, but I have heard things about them
Hmmm how can you b sure you really don't like something if you have never tried it personally. Even if your twin absolutely hated something and you guys have the exact same tastes you might still want to give it a try. You should try it because there is still the smallest possibility that you could like it even if everything you know about it says you won't.

25. Run out of your comfort zone
Monotony has to be the killer of creativity. Doing the same exact thing every single day is so boring. The thing I like to do most is anything I haven't done before. I will try anything at least once, well excluding truly exotic foods or hanging with deadly animals like snakes. Other then those things bring it on! I want to try it all skydiving, surfing, run a marathon, travel anywhere, climb mountains, or whatever else I can find I want to do it. Attempting new things are pretty much the only way to grow. Sucky people don't like to try new things and they try to talk others out of trying new things. If it ends up that you don't like whatever it is you tried then at least you can learn from the experience.

The weekend is nearing and I don't see anything exciting happening. I am tempted to do a kayaking tour but I can't really justify spending  money on it. Could join in the Thirsty Thursday festivities but thats looking a little doubtful. So I'm going to likely spend the weekend looking at my computer screen continuing my terrible attempt at school this semester. Ahh I need an assistant to do my homework because I don't want to do it. At least I am for sure off Saturday, hopefully I have Sunday off too!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

24. Being a Spectator is the easy part

I love sports, football season is my favorite time of year while also giving me a good reason for some Sunday fundays. Music is another thing I am a fan of, I pretty much am obsessed with it. It brings a tear to my eye when I say I haven't been to a live concert in years. Man I freaking miss those days when we always made it to concerts every year. We drove drove to Chicago and back in one day just to see the Usher Confessions Tour. Me and my sister drove eight hours in one day just for that concert. I am fan and a spectator of a lot of things, so I choose the things I want to watch/support nobody tells me that I have to watch games or go to concerts or visit museums. (Yeah the museum thing is just an example after being trapped at the Getty Museum in L.A. for hours I have not been to another one.) It sucks that other people want to be mean and do stupid things just because they feel like it.

24. Being a Spectator is the easy part
I never really understood why people go to concerts and throw bottles at the artist performing. Or go to football games then start fights with people rooting for the opposite team. Or try to start a fight with a professional boxer or MMA fighter when you see them out somewhere. Then you have those people that feel the need to go on Youtube or Twitter to attack something. It never fails on most videos posted on Youtube there is some random person saying how much the video sucks or how the person in it is the worst singer alive or how ugly they are. If you don't like something either be constructive with your criticism  or simply say you don't like it. Do not think you have the right as a spectator to personally attack something or someone because people that do that are sucky people. Seriously nobody cares what you think and nobody needs you to post irrelevant viscous negative comments when people are just trying to express themselves. There is a reason you can pick who you follow on Twitter and luckily you can also unfollow people! So all of you people with nothing better to do but attack others for no reason you have permission to shut your mouth now. Dueces

Soo you want to know how not to spend your day off! How about literally sleeping through most of the day which is what happens when you suck at life. Yep I officially suck at life :( I got up this morning and went to the bank downtown then stopped at a few other stores then a cleaned a bit then passed out in front of my computer. I wasted the day today and accomplished nothing. Oh well on to the next one. I would like to thank Vh1 for making me want to go on the best cruise ever this year even more then I wanted to last year :( If anybody gets to go please send me all the stories of the amazing time you had because it is looking like unless I win the lottery I will not be there. Vh1 Best Cruise Ever 2011

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

23. Blame it on.......umm yourself?

Blame it by Jamie Foxx was my jam when it came out and I can get with what the song is saying. Alcohol easily lowers inhibitions which leads people to make bad decisions. My whole issue with people saying, "oh it is ok that I did it because I was drunk" or "I wouldn't have done that if I was sober" is that it is a cop out. Trust me I have been drunk enough to the point where I am literally comatose and I will take responsibility for all of my actions. Yep, even the dumb ones were all me. You made the choice to drink or the choice to steal something or the choice to wear jean on jean or the choice to do the cupid shuffle. You are making those choices so if they come back to smack you (*sidenote* after I finish my campaign against driving scooters on public roads I am working on getting the cupid shuffle banned) you only have yourself to blame.

23. Blame it on.......umm yourself?
Let me break this down into the important question everyone should ask themselves when they are in a bad situation: who, what, where, why and when. When did I get to this terrible place I didn't want to go, why am I in this ugly place, where can I go from here, what should I do differently to prevent myself from getting back here, and who can I blame for where I am. Drumroll on this last statement please.......YOURSELF. You can try to justify the road you traveled and why you traveled it all you want but in the end the only person in that jail cell is you buddy. I will give you a little leeway because you likely had some assistance getting to the sucky place you are at, some people are dealt unbelievably crappy cards. But I have seen people make it through the biggest obstacles I could ever imagine that were put in front of them so everybody has the opportunity to succeed the only thing is not everybody is strong enough to do it. Can you honestly say your entire life you been suppressed and not allowed to achieve anything? I'm not buying it. So don't be a sucky person that blames all the poor life choices on everything but themselves.

Day off tomorrow!!!!! Sooo happy I do not have to deal with drugged up idiots who think were trying to steal their drugs from them. I am thinking that even if I accomplish nothing tomorrow it will be considerably better then spending the day at work. I plan to clean since for the first time in three weeks Bhavisha's mattresses are actually in her bedroom. It is so weird to walk into our apartment and not see a mattress slouched on the wall next to her box spring. Now I will be forced to do some cleaning maybe workout a little possibly do an assignment or two and I absolutely have to hit the bank. Exciting day ahead of me tomorrow so I need some beauty rest. Night!

Monday, September 13, 2010

22. I forgive you but I am going to remind you of your transgression against me for the rest of your life :)

An eye for an eye right? Revenge will make you feel better. Anger is always the best emotion to make a decision or justify an answer. I am going to say no to all the above. Bitterness, anger, and rage are just ugly emotions that benefit nobody. There are things that you do and people do that are just unforgivable, things happen. Those situations suck and just breed negativity so when you lose a relationship where the person can not forgive you it is important you forgive yourself. Vice versa even if you can not forgive somebody personally you have to forgive their actions, expel them out of your life and move on. Spending years getting pissed off about the same incident repeatedly and you will find yourself in the exact same spot you started in.

22. I forgive you but I am going to remind you of your transgression  against me for the rest of your life :)
If the words I forgive you come out of your mouth you should probably mean them. I have seen people accept an apology then turn around and punish the person for what they did repeatedly. Here is a crazy suggestion if you do not really forgive somebody do not say you do. I know crazy talk. But it really seems to me life would be a lot less stressful if people were upfront about their thoughts. Add this to your life rules: forgiveness is almost never unrestricted so to be fair let the other person know you do not handing them a free pass. Say I don't fully forgive you now but I think I will someday. Simple and it lets them know that everything is not butterflies and rainbows again. If you say you forgave what they did but you are still using it as ammo when it benefits you then you did not forgive them you just pretended too. People that going around collecting ammo or keeping score just waiting for the opportunity to use against somebody are sucky people. We all make mistakes forgive us or don't forgive us but don't give a false impression of neutrality.

I pretty much love my work schedule this week. Work two days, then off a day, then work two more days, and then off for the weekend. I could get used to these hours if only the pay rate and actual job didn't make me want to punch something. And no I still have not opened a textbook. Oh well I am still in the process of writing out my life, I think the dream job will just come to me in my sleep or in some dramatic epiphany. When I know then I will know. Until then back to the day job.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

21. Follow the yellow brick road but don't be mad about where you end up

There are times when I am confident enough in my abilities to be a leader so those are the times when I lead. Then there are times when I believe somebody else knows more than I do so those are the times that I follow. There are also those times when I could care less what happens so I just go along with whatever the majority decides. I am pretty laid back and try to take things as they come. I just can't stand when the people who are always the ones never to plan the vacations or pick the restaurant are the first people to announce they don't like the decision that was made.

21. Follow the yellow brick road but don't be mad about where you end up
Ok so the path that is already worn in and well traveled will always be the best way to go. It means you do not have to break out the map yourself which is always a plus. Also why would you want to drive when you could be the passenger. Personally I really could do either it just depends on my mood. Now when you follow people or ride passenger then decide not to speak up until you reach your destination then you only have yourself to blame. You suck if you are the person who gets somewhere then complains when they get there because it is not where they wanted to go. Guess what compliance is the same thing as making a decision. So next time you are in a group and get the feeling you are going the wrong way speak up. When your leader asks if anybody has any suggestions speak up. When you reach the end and you never said anything along the way shut your mouth. Saying I told you so is rude and annoying. So don't be a sucky person and place the blame on the one person who had the guts to make some decisions. Speak now or forever hold your peace does not only pertain to weddings.

Hmm the Colts game did not go exactly how I envisioned it going but there is still a whole season for them to hit their stride. What is on my agenda for the rest of the day? Well since you asked I am actually going to do some homework until something comes along to distract me. I think a trip to Tybee might happen if Bhavisha makes it out of Homesgoods anytime in the near future. I could use a walk on the beach and a boozy tdaiquiri to forget the bad football game. Happy Funday Sunday!!!Later :)

Saturday, September 11, 2010

20. R-E-S-P-E-C-T

This might just be me but when a word is the main theme of a song do you find yourself singing the song while your spelling the word? Literally as I was typing the title to this post I was singing in Aretha's voice while suppressing the urge to breakout in a full Glee song and dance routine. It is a reflex, still to this day i rap "I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T do you know what that means" even though that song annoys me I can not help myself. I foresee the future national spelling bees to include the option to sing/rap a response. Actually I think that would probably help in the ratings. I can see little kids stepping up to the microphone and after the judge gives them the word they ask them to drop a beat for them. Now that would be a good show. But respecting other people is an important lesson everyone needs to learn. It's not hard, you do not have to like me but you should respect the fact that I have a right to be who I am as long as it doesn't harm anyone.

20. R-E-S-P-E-C-T
It is inevitable that you will come across people you really can't stand. There are way too many personalities in this world for every single person to like each other. It is okay to not like somebody but you should respect them. Just because a person does not have the same views as you do doesn't mean you can put them down or taunt them. I know it is hard because I have had a few instances where the people were just so rude I had to be rude back. There are those people out  there that seriously so irritating that you can't even stand being in the room with them. Leave the room if you feel yourself not being able to suppress the urge to say something unproductive. Most confrontations that I have witnessed between strangers were caused by some dumb misunderstanding that could've been prevented. Respect me and I will respect you then the world will rotate evenly. Do not be a sucky person who doesn't have respect for other people. Even the smelly guy asking you for a dollar deserves some respect.

Even though I know everyone is already aware that tomorrow at 1:00 pm the Indianapolis Colts are playing in their first regular season game I wanted to put in a little reminder. So excited to see them play and also because tomorrow can't suck even though I'm watching the game all by my lonesome. Football games make me a happy girl. Everyone better have a good funday sunday I know I will.

Friday, September 10, 2010

19. The Grass Could be Greener....or it Could be Covered in Dog Poop

Expressions or sayings can really sum up everything into one sentence.  They are really good are delivering a message that goes straight to the  point without getting confusing. A good quote can  make sense of  the biggest, ugliest, daunting mess. Twitter is so addicting because not only are you hearing directly from a person but they are forced to deliver their messages staying strictly on point. People don't want to read a novel  all the time sometimes they just want the news without all the filler. When you are limited on space you are pressured into  being  sincere because you less room for error. Confucius knew how to pack a punch into a sentence  which is why we are still quoting him today. A few of Confucius's sayings were, "Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves", "Respect yourself, and others will respect you", and "What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others". I love a good quote. Getting back to my topic I decided I would base today's post on a common expression. It goes something like the grass is not always greener on the other side or it is greener.......dang it I can't remember exactly how it goes.

19. The Grass Could be Greener....or it Could be Covered in Dog Poop
Your born. You spend years in school that is mandatory. You then choose what to spend the rest of your life doing. No matter what you decide to do after high school you always want to do better then what you have. I get that, everyone has a natural urge to better themselves. Now where this urge becomes a bit self-indulgent is where you turn into a sucky person. I do not like people that sit around waiting for the next thing to come along that is better then what they have. Then they throw away what they had and just move on without even a thought. We do this with material things such as cellphones and toys which I understand once something you once loved becomes obsolete you get the new version. I get that, what I don't get is doing this with people. Relationships ending should never be based on finding someone new so you get rid of the old. People that do that suck because obviously you were not happy in your current relationship so you should have ended it when you realized that. Don't lead somebody on just because you enjoy the comfort of having a spare around just in case you need it. We do this with friendships too, we let our old friends be replaced by new ones or new boyfriends/girlfriends. Not saying stick in a bad relationship I'm saying realize the difference between abandonment  and a mutually beneficial separation. So yes the grass could be greener on the other side so go ahead try it out if you want but just so you know dog poop smells and sucks to get off of your shoe.

I should be asleep by now because I have to be at my roommates' parent's house by 9 a.m. You know once you live with somebody and they know your schedule it becomes hard to get out doing things you don't really want to do. For example, tomorrow I have to go to an Indian party because when she said that I had to go she also made sure to point out she knew I had nothing else to do. The I have homework excuse only bought me a reason not to stay for the entire party. Don't get me wrong I am sure the ceremony that Indian's do to bless a new house is going to be wild, I just would rather do homework or watch a movie or swim or really do anything else that does not involve me getting up at 8 a.m. Besides no good party starts at 10 a.m. thats when the good ones should be ending.

18. Is it Halloween? Then why are you wearing a costume

Halloween is really high on my list of top ten holidays, I love any holiday that involves me drinking with all my friends while wearing a costume or t-shirt.(Yes, I really do have a list of the top ten best holidays and Christmas is not even on it.) I think people love to put on costumes because it gives them a chance to be anybody they want to be while getting a break from being themselves. I love costumes on Halloween but on any other day of the year I like people to be who they are. It sucks when you really think you know somebody then they do something that makes you question if you ever really knew them.

18. Is it Halloween? Then why are you wearing a costume?
BE YOU! Best advice anybody could ever give somebody it would be to be themselves no matter what. If you are a douche then be a douche don't pretend to be nice at first then later on suddenly morph into super douche. If you like to sleep around then admit you sleep around don't pretend your all innocent then when all the people you've hooked up with come to light you will look dumb. Nobody likes to feel like they were tricked. I think people were more mad about tiger woods sleeping around on his wife because he tried so hard to portray the wholesome good guy. Be honest you will get more respect that way. People that pretend to be something their not suck.

I was going somewhere else with this but now i'm tired and going to bed. Something involving how I don't get what the point of bacon flavored vegetarian products or non-alcoholic beer. But I will visit those complaints another day.I could edit this later but I probably won't because my laziness usually wins. Helllooo weekend your so close I can almost see you.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

17. Entitlement-itis

What is Entitlementitis?
Well in case you didn't know entitlementitis is a behavioral disease that causes people to think that the whole world owes them something. They will walk around with expectations for things that they have not worked for but feel that they deserve. They have not realized that nobody is owed anything and nothing in life is guaranteed.
Entitlementitis can be short-term or long lasting, in most cases the length of the flair up can only be determined by the individual. If you or somebody you know experiences this disease for a long period of time please smack them across the face. Yes, it is ok to slap yourself.

What causes Entitlementitis?
The cause of entitlementitis is unknown, it has been determined that it can not be blamed on genetics. It is believed to be caused by a combination of environment and individual personality. If people are consistently given whatever they want and have people telling them it is ok then of course they will continue to benefit at no cost to themselves. TINSTAFL- there is no such thing as a free lunch (see I learned something in high school thanks Mr. Mann) one example would be if your entire family is on Medicaid then all the people working around you are paying for your family. It is not FREE!

How is Entitlementitis  diagnosed? 
There is no test invented yet to determine who has the disease. Luckily the symptoms are easily caught through human interaction. Since the symptoms are not easily hidden most of the time you can tell if somebody has the disease by having a conversation with them. If they constantly claim to be the victim and sit around expecting things they have not worked for chances are they have the disease.

How is it treated?
Behavioral diseases are usually the hardest to treat. Because people's personalities are so different every person would likely need a personalized treatment plan. Some steps that could be taken if you or somebody you know has the disease:
1. Slap them(  I don't condone violence but in this case some people are so deep in it they need something drastic)
2. Repeatedly tell them nobody owes them anything! When I say nobody I mean nobody, not their parents, not the government, not your job. We are guaranteed nothing in our lives just the air we breathe and some day I'm sure we will have to pay for that.
3. Have them watch a Disney movie because musicals make you want to dance and cartoons are cute so when you put them both together it will make anybody smile.
4. Smack them again to make sure they have come back to reality. Oh and people that do suffer from entitlementitis suck.

Now that I have informed everyone about this fatally annoying disease please everyone spread the word. I will spread the word while I go watch the Saints take on the Vikings soooo happy it's football season :)

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

16. Why You Gotta go and make things so complicated?

I would like to thank Avril for the inspiration on this one. Puzzles are fun, when I was younger we went through a puzzle phase. Those 1000 piece puzzles would sit out on the table until we finished it and we would freak out if we lost even one piece along the way. That would be bad news bears for sure. Why did we have to do the 1000 piece puzzle instead of hmm an 100 piece puzzle. You get the same result at the end of both kinds, you get some picture of a flag or pony. So why did we feel the need to do the puzzle with the 1000 small pieces. Because it was a bigger challenge and bigger challenges bring bigger rewards. Back then 1000 pieces just seemed so much more exciting.

16. Why you gotta go and make things so complicated?
I think it was in middle school technology class or maybe it was high school Spectra....anyway in some class we learned the acronym KISS which means keep it simple stupid. I really do not understand why some people just feel the need to make simple things sooo complicated. Leads to why we have all had hours of conversations spent counseling friends on should they stay with their boyfriend who still hangs out with his ex-girlfriend who is dating his best friend that your hooking up with. I mean really people do we just need drama to survive. I do not get it, sometimes I can't even keep track of who is friends with who. You know where it gets really bad, goodness you want some constant drama hang out in any workplace. It never fails as soon as one person walks out of the door you will hear what everybody else is saying behind their back. It is like for a group of people to function there has to be hierarchy that involves various people being punching bags. So in case you can't decipher who the sucky person is in this topic it is the person making things complicated. The person who brings the drama or always brings obstacles for anybody involved to jump through. Complicated is not always exciting sometimes it is just annoying.

For some reason I am on my way to becoming an insomniac because for some freaking reason when 3 a.m. rolls I feel like my day should be starting. Which is weird because I have never worked a night shift in my life so why my body feels that 3 a.m. is the best time for me to be productive I don't know. Guess this means I need a career that happens between the hours of midnight and 5 a.m. This sucks because if I went to bed right now I would get about 5 hours of sleep. Ahh thank you internal clock for getting screwed up somewhere in the last few weeks. Hopefully tomorrow I can trick my body into being semi-normal and actually start my work oh lets see during the hours of anytime before 3 a.m.
......sooo expect a post tomorrow right around this time because like everyone else my body doesn't listen to me.
***Sidenote, if we removed cuss words and the word like from our vocabularies they would sound really different. Because we use like as a filler usually to buy time for us to complete our thoughts and curse words are really just unimaginative. So today when your talking attempt to do it without using the word like or any curse words and see if your conversation doesn't seem ten times more intelligent.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

15. Dude we get it, you hate your job...

This is an open letter:
Dear Sir Sucks-a-lot,
I am fully aware that nobody grows up saying they want to work at places like 7-11 or Burger King or Wal-Mart for the rest of their lives. But since you are working at a job you hate you might as well put a freaking smile on your face. Actually forget the smile I just want you to do your freaking job without an attitude. Guess what you are not the only person in the world that hates your job and I am not paying you to slowjack when all I want to do is to get out of the store as quickly as possible. Dude the choices you made obviously didn't lead where you wanted to go but since your here let me give you a few suggestions. Get off your cellphone as soon as you see somebody waiting in line and don't act as if a customer needing service is interrupting your personal time. Because if I'm not mistaken your the one wearing the uniform and getting a paycheck for a little something you should be doing called work.
Thanks and Goodnight
P.S. In case you didn't realize you kinda suck

Monday, September 6, 2010

14. Try not to be extremely lazy

Procrastination is a talent of mine, I am actually pretty awesome at it. If I have to write a ten page paper for class that I was given two months to write I will probably wait until the last week before class is out to do it. Then I will spend every last minute scrambling to get it done so that I can get a passing grade. Why do I continue to do this, well I am lazy when it comes to certain things. I will watch a movie instead of reading for school or I will sleep in instead of working out. My laziness typically only affects me so I am not too worried about it. Sometimes I will actually do my homework ahead of time and sometimes I won't. Now since my laziness only effects me I would not say that I am extremely lazy. The people that are extremely lazy are just annoying.

14. Try not to be extremely lazy
Again I am going to go to my job for an example of extreme laziness. Since I work in the pharmacy people will call us when they run out of refills and expect us to call their doctor to get them more. Guess what calling your doctor for you because you are too lazy to do it yourself is not in my job description we do it as a courtesy. So when people call yelling at us because we didn't get a new prescription from their doctor really not our fault. Some doctors offices actually require the patient  to call themselves because really it just makes more sense. Littering is another example of extreme laziness because really how hard would it be for you to find a trashcan. Rule to live by, do not ask anybody else to do something that you can do yourself. Extremely lazy people suck. 

For some reason I am super tired and am falling asleep as I write this so i'm taking a nap before I tackle the two weeks of schoolwork I haven't done. Yep procrastination at it's finest. I will probably never learn.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

13. Eat Dirt.,.,.,.,.,

My name is Amanda and I'm NOT an alcoholic. Don't worry this is not a cry for help and I do not need any 12 step programs to kick alcohol but I could probably use some to kick my other bad habits. This weekend is a holiday weekend and all I want to do is chill somewhere with cool people drinking lots of alcoholic beverages. I'm making these statements because I have been called an alcoholic before and for some reason today I was reminded of it. The definition of an alcoholic is when somebody is drinking alcoholic beverages at a level that interferes with physical health, mental health, and social, family, or job responsibilities. Have I had a job since I was 16 yep, do I have regular responsibilities yep, and do I do my school work.....well no but I can't blame that one on alcohol sadly. I don't do my homework because I am easily distracted. Now that we have clarified that, til the day comes that I have a drink first thing in the morning I think i'm good. Honestly drinking everyday would be a chore to me at this point but every few days is a must. I just wanted to clarify i'd be closer to a binge drinker not an alcoholic for future reference.

13. Eat Dirt
Your probably asking yourself what my binge drinking has to do with eating dirt. Nothing. Honestly the two topics are not really related in any way. If you want to know anything about me I am a little random so sometimes you will see I write whatever comes to mind. I love anybody that is willing to put themselves out there and make a fool of themselves. You have to be able to make mistakes to make it in anything or anywhere in life. Sucky people are the ones who will try to put up this front, like they've never fell down in front of a crowd or had food on their face. To have the right to laugh at anybody else you have to be able to laugh at yourself. So if the day comes when you fall face first in a pile of dirt (this is metaphorically, but if you really end up with dirt in your mouth that works too) laugh don't pretend it didn't happen.

In case you were wondering the definition of binge drinking is  the consumption of five or more drinks in a row by men — or four or more drinks in a row by women — at least once in the previous 2 weeks. So all my friends out there that are going to spend the day binge drinking and enjoying people have fun. But please binge drink responsibly. To all my sober friends have fun too. Happy Holiday :)

Saturday, September 4, 2010

12. Write your judgments in sand not stone

I'm back!!!!! Anybody miss me? No ha oh well. This week has been a little bit off schedule, I haven't been posting regularly and for some reason the posts from my phone came through in gibberish. But now that my friend has headed back to Kentucky I am no longer on vacation which means I have to actually have a schedule that involves more then eating, drinking, and hanging by the pool. Sadface to doing actual work but I am ready to do something productive. Now while I have been gone I have of course kept my eye out for sucky people and their random acts of suckyness!

Now on to today's little topic: judging people. We all do it and anybody that says they don't is a freaking liar. It is human nature to pre-judge everything, consider it a reflex. You walk into a room you of course look around the room and depending on who else is in the room you decide where you want to go. If you see somebody covered in dirt your going to assume they can't afford a shower.We are attracted to people most similar to ourselves or how we view ourselves. If outward appearances were not a deciding factor throughout our lives we would not spend nearly as much time as we do trying to maintain them. There is nothing wrong with this and really judging will likely save you a few times in your life. You know how it could take you a few times hearing a song before it grows on you. Everything and everyone changes, nothing is ever the exact same the second time around. That little feeling in your stomach telling you not to trust somebody will probably turn out to be right in the long run.

12. Write your judgments in sand not stone
Now we have established that judging a situation or person is human nature and that we all do it. Realize after you have made those little judgments of yours realize that they could be wrong. You could get it all wrong! We've all done it, made a snap judgment then come to found out later that you are totally inaccurate. I work in pharmacy and selling drugs to people puts you on the defensive. Just because most of the time you are right when you think people are abusing drugs. You assume people coming in buying nasal decongestant looking dirty are making meth. Most times my assumptions turn out right but there have been a few times that a person has walked up to the counter looking like their on meth and turns out they just sick. So the lesson of the day, go ahead and judge but give people at least an opportunity or two to dispute your judgment. Because we all have our off days and we should allow other people some wiggle room every now and then. Don't be a sucky person and judge somebody then not give them a chance to surprise you. Everyone loves a good surprise :)

Now today has been one of the longest days of my life and I realized people are crazy among other things. I'm going to attempt some homework then ill probably lay myself down to sleep. Tomorrow is a whole new day.