Wednesday, August 18, 2010

1. Have a J-O-B

First post of my first blog so it can only get better from here....

I haven't worked for almost two weeks now and as week two comes to a close I can understand how people end up 800 pounds. In the last couple of weeks my main routine has involved eating while watching movies or eating while listening to music while putting stuff away. Of course I have done other things as in jogging the trail along the marshes, shopping for apartment necessities, doing pointless errands for other people, eating free Subway, shopping for more apartment stuff, being the sober driver for wasted puking people one night, using the free Internet at Starbucks, and grocery shopping. Since fifty percent of my life in the last two weeks has involved eating it leads me back to the 800 pound home bound dude. I can honestly see how that dude gets there, laying in my bed eating while watching movie's has become the bulk of my day. You get to the point when you ask yourself if it is even worth getting out of bed to accomplish nothing. If it weren't for the fact that I am a control freak who has to shower everyday I would be well on my way to being that girl who ate herself into bed.

I really do not know what people that don't work do all day. I feel like it has been years since I've been productive added to the fact that the Internet and/or TV do not make up for normal human contact. I've had two moments recently that actually scared me and if it weren't for my family and friends keeping me sane I would have jumped in my car a driven back to Indiana.One moment was today as I continued my junk food binge that I really could end up 800 pounds stuck in my bed soon if I continue to meal all day and everyday. (So I made a mental note to no longer eat in my bed and I have to do all six miles on the trail tomorrow) The other moment was when I was grocery shopping the other day I had an sudden fear that when I do actually go back to work I won't know how to act. I have been out of a normal routine for only two weeks and I already feel that socially I will come off as a home school jungle freak (yes it is a Mean Girls reference) whenever I meet normal cool people. (My roomates' friends are pretty normal I just haven't hung out with them enough and my roommate is really in a world of her own) All this randomness leads me to the first way not to suck:
1.Have a J-O-B 
Not having a job not only sucks but I feel like I am a sucky person. I really want to ask a person that is professionally unemployed how they do it because I am personally bored. Yes I have an abundance of free time that I used to dream of but you know what I am doing with that free time.....NOTHING!!! I honestly have become more lazier then I was before which is pretty bad because I have always been pretty lazy. Now I'm not judging people who honestly are looking for a job everyday or are possibly pursuing their passion like a struggling musician or something but not knowing I am getting a paycheck next week makes me feel so lazy I can't stand it. I should be able to support myself and even if it is just a little bit of money I'll take that over none. I have never quit a job without having another one to go to. So next week I will go back to work with a 50 percent pay cut and hopefully be able to do with a semi-decent attitude.

First blog entry done I hope it wasn't too bad. This will be a daily thing trust me I know of a lot of sucky things people do. (Michelle I hope this makes you happy ha ha I tried, love you!)

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